Monday, September 20, 2010

Higher Forces

I paid for Saxony on Sunday, making it official. There she stood, grazing quietly in the rain. I left with her grooming kit and a few other things her previous owner, M, passed on to me. M was teary-eyed, and I understood why. Big changes in her life prompted her to sell her beloved mare, nothing more. She's going on the road and you can't haul a horse trailer behind a semi truck to any real purpose. She was letting go of the horse of a lifetime and we both knew it. Even though there were many steps along the way to my buying Saxony, I'm sure it seemed shockingly sudden to her how quickly she'd sold her horse.

Honestly, I felt humbled and subdued in the face of my good fortune. Because I'd just flown back from Kansas City that morning after a cluttered, jam-packed couple of days on the road, I was tired, too. That helped dial down my excitement, but I would have lowered the volume further on myself if I'd had to so as to not celebrate my gain in the face of M's feelings of loss. I haven't even begun with this horse, but I already know some of what she is, so our transaction was more about M giving her up than me taking ownership of her.

I got in the Pathfinder with H.G. and left without visiting Saxony, peaceful in the belief that numberless days lay before us, but also
aware how suddenly it happened that I bought her. Save for Nature itself, I don't perceive or believe in the presence of higher forces. Except there are surprises. If luck lies in acting without hesitation when opportunity presents itself, then I'm amazed I did it, startled I did it. That's never been my way in life, being someone who's lost too much to waiting. What moved me now?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Congratulations - can't want to hear more about your lovely new mare!